Our entire lives the images we have been presented with tell us that this is the way it is. We are constantly bombarded with images of "perfect" relationships on television and in the movies. And it occurs even more than we realize because we are so accustomed to it. But can being exposed to too many of these fictitious fairytales spoil our love lives?
A study by Heriot Watt University in Edinburgh, Scotland, says yes. Researchers divided subjects into to random groups. One group watched a romantic comedy while the other watched an action-drama. At the end of the films, the subjects were given a questionnaire.
Subjects who watched the romantic comedy were more likely to indicate that they believed in fate or destiny than those who watched the action-drama.
The researchers also studied to top 40 box-office hits from 1995-2005. They found that they majority had similar themes on love, which they deemed unrealistic.
So not only are we presented with unrealistic scenarios, but research is indicating that it's affecting our outlook. Another group of researchers from Heriot Watt University surveyed marriage counselors who indicated that unrealistic relationship expectations were a major issue they saw with their clients. An often cited ideal was that if someone is meant to be with you then they will know what you want without you having to communicate it.
And, if you think about it, how often do we see couples with good communication skills in the media? Not very often. Here's the difference: theyre not in real relationships, they don't have to. And, as easy as that is to understand, we sometimes forget it.
Could our fascination with these unrealistic relationships have anything to do with the failures of our own? Currently, over 40 percent of marriages in the United States end in divorce according to divorcerate.org.
When our own relationships dont turn out like the ones we see on television, are we more inclined to give up? The best thing any of us can do is set realistic expectations for ourselves. Our lives are not movies; things don't always work out perfectly. But that's okay. Life's journey that doesn't end after two hours in a theater.
So this Valentine's Day, instead of looking around every corner wondering if youre going to be swept off of your feet, take a step back and give yourself a reality check. Figure out what you want, not what the media is telling you, you should want.
